Christmas

I can't believe Christmas is just a week away. I have had a very hard time getting into the spirit this year. To be honest I have had to force myself to do a lot of things. My wonderful husband is in the middle of peak and has been working longer and harder than he has in years past. I am so very grateful he has a job its just so very hard this time of year because I spend a lot of the time alone. I so wish he had a job that would allow us to go to Oklahoma for Christmas from time to time but right now he doesn't. I have a new found appreciation for those who have spouses who work far from home. I don't know how they do it day after day.

Day 30

Today Im grateful for a husband who knows when and how to make me laugh. Sometimes I can take whats going on around me too seriously and he always knows that and knows just what to say and do to make me smile.

Day 29

I am so very grateful for my friend Sabrina. It was with her urging that we began our weight loss journey together. She has been a dear friend and has allowed me to love her children. I have a small sense of the joys and frustrations that come with being a mom. Today as I got out of her car, her 4 year old son told me he loved me. Im going to miss her terribly when she moves to CA this weekend. My one solice is that she's not moving far and I can go visit. Thank You Sabrina for being my friend and my sister.

Days 24 Through 28

Day 24

I'm thankful for my parents. I have not been able to celebrate any holidays with them since I got married. I'm grateful for all the efforts they put in every year to make Thanksgiving wonderful.

Day 25

I'm grateful that while my Thanksgiving meal was not that great (going out usually isn't as good as making your own), that I didn't have any leftovers to tempt me. Im working so hard on this weightless journey and have a very strong desire to succeed.

Day 26

I'm grateful my husband has a good job. I'm grateful for all the hard work ALL the UPS employees put in every year to make sure we all have our Christmas presents. I hope all of you take a moment and thank their families for the sacrifice they make in not having their loved ones around during the holidays.

Day 27

Im thankful for a Primary class that asks the question Why. Today it turned into a wonderful teaching experience which I treasure. They remind me of why Im doing what I am.

Day 28

I'm grateful for my little online support group. I'm grateful I can go to them with questions on how to handle some situations and that they are inspired to give me the answers and guidance Im in search of. I appreciate that its a private group so I don't have to worry about my business being spread.

Days 22 & 23

Day 22 I am thankful for missionary experiences. Im grateful for the people I have met and for the connection I have to them

Day 23

I am grateful I had the opportunity to attend an interfaith Thanksgiving Eve service tonight. It brought me much needed peace and reminded me once again that we all have so much to be grateful for even when it doesn't seem that way

Days 18-21

Day 18
I am thankful for my home. I am grateful for its location and that its safe and sound after the fires

Day 19
I'm grateful for all my answered prayers both asked for and those that maybe I didnt ask for. Im grateful for the comfort they give

Day 20
I'm grateful for my Savior Jesus Christ. I'm grateful for his sacrifice on my behalf.

Day 21
I'm grateful to have a wonderful husband who has been so supportive as I have embarked on this journey. Without him I would not be as successful as I have been

Day 17

Today I am grateful that I live in the day and time I do. As I was taking a shower this morning and shaving my legs I realized I don't think I would have made a good pioneer. enjoy the modern stuff too much

Day 16

Today I am grateful for my health. As many of you know I suffer from both Type 2 Diabetes and Psoriatic Arthritis. For the last year or so I have been off of my arthritis medications because I was advised by a doctor that in planning on trying to get pregnant that if I can function in day to day life without my arthritis medications its better overall. So when I ran out of the medication I didnt go for a refill. So far I have more good days than bad. I am able to exercise regularly and in fact find that the more I move the better I feel. I still have days where I hurt and it takes all I have to get moving but I know I am being given a gift and for that I am very grateful.

Day 15

First off I have to share my latest achievement. I got my 10lbs lost ribbon today. I'm so excited. My goal for the next month is to hit the gym hard every day do better on my eating so I can reach my next goal sooner.

Now for what I'm greatful for. I'm greatful for the ability I have to read good books. To me there is nothing like cuddling up on the couch reading a good book. It allows me to escape for a short time and I find I emerge refreshed.

Day 14

Today I am so grateful for inspiration I received and then having a doctor confirm what I felt. I have been concerned about the medications I am on and how they affect when and if we are able to get pregnant. A month or so ago I had an answer given as to the path we were to take told John about it and then have been working on getting to the goal. Today my doctor eased all my fears and now I know Im doing the right thing. No we aren't trying yet but for those of you who know me well know that because of some of the health issues I have I have to do a little more prep work.

Day 13

Today I am thankful for the two sweet boys in my primary class who through their sweet ways remind me that I am doing the right thing as far as a church assignment at this time

Day 12

Today I am thankful for our dog. Shes a little ball of fire. I have had a difficult week and she has some way of knowing that I need extra love, so she has stuck by me all week. I jokingly call her my little minion. I am amazed that one of Heavenly Fathers creatures has a second sense, so much so that shes added something to our little family that can't be replaced. And from time to time she provides comic relief.

Day 11

Today I'm thankful for all of the men in my family who served in the armed forces. Without these brave men and women we would not have the freedoms we have today. I know our country is in turmoil right now and I feel its important to remember what it is we have, what has been fought for, and stand up for what is right and let our voices be heard when things are going so very wrong.
So thank you to the following who served from my family both living and dead
Charles Young
Ernest Clark
Chris Tyler
Jim Tyler
Richard Zinnick
Paul McBee

Day 10

I'm greatful the sun is out today. One of the hardest things for me to get used to here is that during the winter its overcast and cloudy most of the time for several months. We have been so fortunate that its been sunny for the last couple of weeks. Its cold yes but ahh I love the sun.

Day 9

I'm grateful for life lessons learned. Sometimes challenges and difficult situations are placed in our path that at the time we don't understand why. However its those times later when a slightly similar situation arises that we realize why we had to face the first one. It makes us stronger and able to handle whatever may come our way.

Day 8

So yesterday should have been days 6 & 7 instead of 5 & 6 Sorry for the confusion

Day 8:
I'm greatful for the following question my husband asks me when life gets too much for me sometimes. Its these simple words "What in this situation do you have control of?" This question has helped me make difficult decisions and to put things into perspective.

Days 5 & 6

Day 5:
I'm greatful for my "second" mom. Shes a lady in my ward that has been my rock since I moved here. Yes my mom knows about her and is greatful I have her. Shes an amazing woman who when my moms not available I can go to for advice or a hug when I need it. No one could ever replace my actual mom, but its nice to have someone you can go to when your own mom is so very far away.

Day 6:
Im greatful for the friends who today listened to me vent some frustrations, and who gave advice. You know who you are and Im greatful for you.,

Gratitude

"There is no such thing as gratitude unexpressed. If it is unexpressed, it is plain, old-fashioned ingratitude." ~Robert Brault

Many of you may have noticed that the latest thing on Facebook is to every day put something you are grateful for. I decided that I would do mine in our blog instead. I have found the last few days that my heart is so very full of gratitude. I also know that sometimes I don't always say how grateful I am. My wonderful husband might disagree with me on this because I tell him thank you all the time but I don't say it to others whom I love and care about. Since its already Novemeber 5th I find myself 5 days behind.

1. I'm grateful for an amazing husband who works very hard to provide for our little family. I'm grateful for the priesthood he holds and for the example he is to me.
2. I'm grateful for wonderful parents who raised me in the gospel so that I haven't had to go through life without it. I'm grateful for all they do for each of us children and for how important it is to them that we have a relationship.
3. I'm grateful for my wonderful sisters. We don't talk as much as we should but I love each of them very much.
4. I'm grateful to the dear friends I have here, especially the one who encouraged me to join Weight Watchers. It has taken a long time to build these relationships and I cherish them
5. I'm grateful I live so close to Lake Tahoe. What an amazing place it is and I can't wait to share it with my family.

What are you grateful for?

Time for an Update

I realized after reading a few of the blogs I follow, especially those of family, that I haven't updated ours in a while. Theres lots going on so here we go. About a month ago John was released as the Ward Executive secretary and then we were both promptly called to be Ward missionaries. I told the bishop that I would accept but I wanted to keep teaching my primary class. Its where I want to be and for a variety of reasons Im not ready to go back to Relief Society yet. If you really want to know the story you can message me and I will fill you in. So anyway, because of Johns work schedule it has been me attending all the weekly meetings. So far I love it but its been getting harder to go to the meetings and making visits alone. So we will see. Im excited because one of the investigators the missionaries have been working with and a sister I have gone to visit a couple of times has decided to get baptised. Shes an amazing lady who is a single mom with 4 kids a couple of which are a handful. I know the gospel will bring great joy to her life and she will find a great support system in the church.
The other thing that has been going on is I decided with a little prodding from a good friend to join Weight Watchers. Its been a total lifestyle change but I have seen some great benefits, one of which is my sugars being the lowest they have been in a long time. So I have had to adjust one of my meds because the sugars were too low. So far with the help of the diet change and exercise I am down 6.6lbs I weigh in tomorrow so we will see. John has been a huge support on this journey and Im finding its a huge help.
John is getting busier and busier at work and is finding that the schedule hes working is draining him. He keeps applying for local jobs but so far nothing. So keep him in your prayers that we will know what to do career wise. He won't quit his current job till he gets a new one so don't worry about that.
So there you have it folks. Our lives are pretty normal and busy.

Sophi our crazy energetic loving dog

When we put Cheyenne to sleep I really wanted another dog and J and I had talked about it. Talked about getting a small one. However I knew the decision was up to him. Im so glad we made the decision to adopt Sophi. She has been a wonderful addition to our home and yes shes our "child" until if and/or when we have an actual child of our own.
Over the past several weeks and with much thanks to my mom for getting me started, I have been walking 2-3.20 miles just about every day. Some days I go to the gym and others if I go early enough and IF its cool enough I go walk around the Sparks marina. Its two miles around and right now im at once. Mainly because I bring Sophi with me and even though I could handle twice she can't haha.
This morning I had to force myself to go. I didn't go yesterday and knew I needed to go today. So after I made sure John was up and out the door Sophi and I headed out. I don't know who was more ready me or her. I have found that she LOVES to go on walks and shes really good on a leash. I had J get me a retractable one for several reasons and for our walks together it works really well. Anyway after our walk, after I gave her water( shes odd and will only drink water from her dish or the dish that my in laws set out for the dogs) for the second time the first being at the half way point, I put her in the car. As I headed home this is where she decided to go in the car and ride.As soon as we got home and after I turned on our cooler she laid down on the couch and has been crashed out for a couple of hours like this


I think next time I take her we will go earlier as she was ready to quit at the half way point. She is getting better and only barked at one dog and made friends with several others.

I don't know how she knows, but she knows when I need love and during the day she stays right by my side. I just wish she wouldn't get me up at all hours of the night. Some of you may ask why my wonderful husband doesn't get up. Well the simple answer is he sleeps really soundly now that he has his cpap machine and that makes it hard to get out of bed. IE he has to disconnect himself. And besides if he knows I have had a rough night with the dog he lets me sleep..

One off the subject comment. I have purchased two Cd's as of recent. One of them is called Women of Faith. Its a compilation CD of several female LDS singers. Its wonderful. The second one J bought me as a surprise. Its the Lady Antebellum new album and it is awesome as well. So there's my recommendation.

Other than that life is back to normal. We are very glad J's done with school and he has started working on finishing the laundry room. I will post pictures when its done!

Realizations

Over the past couple of weeks and especially last night for some reason, it hit me very hard that some may see me as a friend of convience. Others don't take the time to get to know me or invite me to do things simply because I don't have children at this point. I went to sleep last night with tears in my eyes because I realized I am tired of people not taking time to get to know me. So I started making a mental list of things that I enjoy doing that I don't think people know. I was going to share some of them here but decided that I will write the whole list in my journal. If you sincerely want to know, most of you have my email or phone number and you can ask. So anyway I was feeling really sorry for myself and then I remembered a talk that Sheri Dew gave in the November 2001 General Conference called"Are we not all mothers". For those of you who aren't members of my church, she was a leader of our womens organzation called Relief Society for several years. I remembered how at the time I was very single, had just moved into an apartment on my own, and how inspiring this article was to me at the time. I realized that I didnt have to have children to be a mom. In this talk she said, "Of all the words they could have chosen to define her role and her essence, both God the Father and Adam called Eve the 'mother of all living'--and they did so before she ever bore a child. Like Eve, our motherhood began before we were born...Motherhood is more than bearing children, though it is certainly that, It is the essence of who we are aw women. It defines our identity, our divine stature and nature, and the unique traits our father gave us." Nowhere in this talk does she say that the only way we can be mothers is by bearing children. I realized then and now this principle. I can be an example and mother figure to children and youth who aren't my own. I know that Heavenly Father reminded me of this article and inspired me to look it up and read it again. I encourage you to read it so you will better understand where I am coming from.
I also decided that if people don't want to take the time to get to know me and become a true friend to me while I don't have children, then if and when we do sorry you aren't worth my time. There are many people and couples who for one reason or another don't have children. I remember having a conversation with my mom a few years ago where she encouraged me to always live my life to the fullest. If I spent every waking hour worrying about trying to have a child then one of two things would happen. I would either go totally insane or I would fall into a deep depression. So I choose to live life. I have found joy in hobbies. Right now its quilting. Oh the joy and peace it gives me. I'm grateful for a dear friend for introducing me to it when John and I first got married and when I moved here. She saw that I needed a friend and this provided a way.
I don't post this so you can feel sorry for me. I post it so you can understand that there is a whole lot more to me and to vent. I do have feelings and am very tender hearted. Sometimes I wear my feelings on my shirtsleeve as my mother calls it. I'm also too nice and won't tell people no. Well those are things I have been working on the last few months. So don't be offended if you ask me to do something and I tell you no. There's a reason for it and I may or may not tell you.

He's DONE!!!!

So as most of you know, since before we got married, John has been working on getting is MSM (Masters of Science in Management). He was supposed to be finished by the first of April and in fact busted is butt finishing his paper, thanks in large part to my family for helping him get people to take the survey he needed to gather data for it. He turned it in and a week later received word from the school and both instructors that his paper was not acceptable and that they bascially thought it needed to be rewritten. Well after several months and a sleep study later he finished the paper. He put a lot of hard work into it, followed the advice of the instructors and the dean and submitted the paper about three weeks ago.
Its thanks to many prayers and all the support that hes finally done. We will tell you NOT to ever use the school he attended online. If you want to know more as to why just ask lol..

Update

John called the sleep center Tuesday to see if by chance they had had any cancellations so he could get in earlier to have his followup and therefore get his cpap machine. Well as luck (and an answer to many many prayers) would have it, they did and we were able to see the doctor Wednesday at 8:30 am. It turns out John has severe apnea. The doctor said he stops breathing 68 times per hour. She said she would fax the order for the cpap machine to the company that our insurance works with and that they would call us to set up an appointment to get the machine. Well an hour after we got home they called and John was able to get it that day. Needless to say both of us have been sleeping very well since. We are very greatful for the answered prayers. It will be nice to have a husband that doesn't go around looking like a zombie

Life Happens

So I was kindly reminded that I hadn't updated the blog lately. Part of it is because I didn't think the stuff that has been going on would be of interest to anyone. But my mom thought it would be so here goes.
I hadn't been to Utah to see my Grandma Clark since April 2010. I have felt strongly for several months that John and I needed to make a trip over so I could see her. Shes 88 years young and I know that the time for her on this earth is getting short. I have a special bond with her and cherish any time spent with her. I felt the same way with my dads parents. Being single as long as I was gave me a wonderful opportunity to be able to go and visit and build a bond with my grandparents that no one can break. Anyway after much convincing and reassuring I got John to take me over to see her. Some of you may wonder why I didn't make contact to see you. Well this trip was very quick and I wanted to spend time seeing family and one very close friend that I hadn't seen since our wedding. Maybe we can connect next trip or we ALWAYS welcome visitors. We had a great visit with my grandma and I also got to see my brother and then my sister and her family. It wasn't long enough for me but hopefully next time we can spend more time.
One of the reasons John was hesitant to drive over is he has been extremely tired lately. He sleeps and still wakes up exhausted. We have been to see a specialist and now know the cause. We are pretty sure he has Sleep Apnea. He has had the sleep study and now we have to wait for the follow up appt. John wishes he could see the doctor sooner rather than later but oh well. I guess we need a lesson in patience. I'm looking forward to no more snoring haha. My family knows all too well at how loud it is. And yes I think its worse than my dads.
As for me Im just trying to keep up on the house and yard. One big adventure was I won tickets to the Reno rodeo from a local TV station here. John was going to go with me but realized the day before that there was no way he could get off work. I made a small attempt to get someone to go with me but decided I needed to venture by myself to this event. Why you say? Well I have learned that with Johns work schedule there are times that if i want to do something I'm going to have to go alone. It would be different if I had single friends here without kids but I don't. I had a blast. Our rodeo is amazing and Im so glad I forced myself to go.
So there you have it..That's kind of what we have been up to. Have a great one

Crusie News

I have been wanting to share the pictures and a video from our cruise for a while, it was just a matter of being patient waiting for John to upload the stuff to our server. About three weeks ago or so John and I along with my parents went on a cruise to the Western Caribbean. We had a blast. I did things I had not done since I was a kid including going down a water slide at a pool in Belize. In Costa Maya we saw Mayan Ruins, in Roatan we learned about the native people and Yes I was picked do dance with the dancers. My mom was picked as well, However she sat down before either my husband or father could get a picture. In Cozumel we went snorkeling. It was the first time I had done this and I'm totally hooked. My lifetime goal is to someday learn to Scuba dive. The ocean is such a magical place. The Snorkel guide for our group was so very kind and loving and caring with my mom. As my family knows she doesn't swim very well. She wanted to snorkel so badly but was afraid that she would not be able to do it and therefore wouldn't have fun. The excursion we picked was a shore side snorkel where we started from the beach. Our guide Dee Dee (a male) stayed by my moms side the entire time and pulled her around via a lifeguard can. Needless to say he now holds a special place in our hearts.
On a spiritual note one of the most amazing things we learned about was the "Tree of Life" that was important to the Mayan people. My thoughts instantly went to the Book of Mormon. My testimony of the truthfulness of this book and its teachings was strengthened. I know that some of you who read this do not share my faith and that's OK. I hope you at least are able to get a sense of how important my faith is to me and get a small glimpse into that side of my life. A very important side that sadly I don' think I vocalize very much and need to work on doing so more. I have included a video and a few pictures below.. Enjoy

Sewing Fun

I decided after looking for a swimsuit coverup in the stores for a while, one that would work for our upcomming cruise that we are going on with my parents, I decided to undertake making some sun dressses. It was my first time doing this all on my own and I was so very nervous but thanks to the help of a friend in my ward I was able to do it. One of them is a sundress that I can wear with a white t-shirt under to church. The purple one sadly because of an error I made while cutting out the pattern, is to short but will work great to wear to the pool. Also I was looking for an easy to make purse and found a pattern on Martha Stewarts website using a pillow case. It was super easy and I had fun making it.. I have included pictures for your enjoyment.

Finally an Update

Life has been a bit crazy for us. I did finally make an outfit for our dog Sophi. Hopefully I am able to load one on here. I found that I had to add a collar on it because otherwise she is able to wiggle out of it..I made one without and a second one with. Its crazy to think that our dog has to have a sweater because she gets cold. Today she has been so cold she was huddled on my lap under a blanket with the sweater on. At the first part of March right after my birthday we went to Oklahoma City to spend time with my family and some friends. As is usually the case the trip wasn't long enough. But hopefully we will be able to make a trip back soon..So the airfare needs to quit going up dang it. While we were there we went to the zoo and took two of my nephews with us because Jackson was sick and Tiffany had to take him to the doctor. John and I had a blast spending time with them. Oh how I have missed them. We thoroughly enjoyed our time there. We are greatful for all the help we got from my family friends and Johns dad in helping him get his surveys done for his Capstone Project. This is his final step in finishing his masters, and at the last minute we needed help getting the survey completed.
I have gotten serious about quilting and am working on two right now. One is closer to being done than the other and hopefully next week Im going to make a trip to one of the Fabric stores to get what I need to finish the top of one of them.

Im loving being in Primary. For the first time in a while I look forward to going to church. My class is full of active children but they make me smile every week.
This is Sophi in the second sweater I made for her
My nephew with a bird on his shoulder. His little brother wanted nothing to do with his lol.

New Project

We have found that no matter how hard we try to keep Sophi off the couch that for the time being its a losing battle, especially when we leave her home alone. The advantage is she doesn't scratch up our couch she just likes to curl up into a ball and go to sleep. John suggested that I make a blanket out of fleece for her to lay on. So last week I went to Hancock Fabrics which had all their fleece on sale for 50% off and bought enough to make this blanket and two coats for Sophi. I finished the blanket today. I took two yards of fleece, cut them in have and then just tied the two halves together by cutting strips. It was an easy project and she loves it. I hope to make the jackets this week. Some of you may say why are you making clothing for your dog? Well shes very tiny, lived in Las Vegas for most of her 4 years so shes not used to our colder weather. And its cheaper to make them than to buy them. Espeically since she doesn't like the sweaters. So far the only thing she doesn't fight wearing is a fleece jacket we bought her so I have taken on this challenege and will post pictures when Im done.
Sophi is a wonderful addition to our home. Shes very loving and so far only one accident and that was the first night. Johns working on training her a little more and so far its going good.
Love you all. Have a great day.

Carrot Cake and a New Arrival

So lots of good things going on with us right now. First off, I decided last Sunday that I wanted to try to make a Carrot Cake that was more Diabetic Friendly that the ones you find at a bakery or a store. So I went online to DiabeticLiving.Com ( I think thats the website) and found one. It has about 25 carbs per serving which is a lot but not as much as if you have a regular one. I had a blast and it was very Yummy and Yes I made it from scratch.

Our next bit of news is that we adopted a new dog. We have named her Sophi. John and I talked a lot about whether or not we wanted to get another dog. In the end I told him I would love another one but it was up to him as to when and if we got one. On Saturday morning he went online and found a dog that caught his interest. She was a bigger dog, slightly smaller than Cheyenne was but he decided he didnt want to go look at her on Saturday. Well yesterday he said he was going to "go get a paper". Well 20 mins later I got a text with a picture of one dog and then a few mins later he sent another with one of Sophi. He then called and said I needed to drive down. So I did and we decided she needed to be part of our home. Shes 4 and came up to Reno from Las Vegas. Shes a Fox Terrier Jack Russell Mix. So far shes very mellow. We have to work on her not eating our food and getting her to tell us when she has to go potty but so far shes wonderful. She is potty trained its just knowing when she has to go out. We have found that she is small enough to get threw our front yard fence so we have to watch her carefully. Below are some pictures of her.

Cheyenne

As some of you may have heard, last night (Wednesday January 19th) John and I had to make the difficult decision to have our beloved dog Cheyenne put to sleep. John has had her since she was about a year old and she was a dear pet to both he and his first wife Katrina. I had grown to love her as well in the year and a half since she has been in my life. Tuesday night we took her with us when we went to the gym. She would ride with us and then wait in the back of our truck. When we got home and had her go out to go potty before we went to bed. As she came back in she slipped comming in the door. It took a minute but we got her in the house. That night she didnt sleep and was very restless. I woke up at 3:30 am and let her out again and then took her out at 6:30 when I got up to get ready. When I got home John gave her a couple of her favorite treats. At around 11am she went out did her business and then came in and had a big drink. For most of the rest of the day she slept. She had a look like she didnt feel good and wasn't really acting herself. When John got home from work and when we couldnt get her to eat what we knew she would normally eat we called a vet that lives in our ward and he said to take her to the after hours animal hospital. We did and after the Vet looked at her she said more than likely she had a brain tumor and because she was 17 years old the best thing was to put her to sleep. I will miss her dearly and so will John. She had a way to make you smile when you were down. Rest in peace baby girl. We love you and will miss you always.

Exciting News!

Before anyone jumps to conclusions NO I am NOT Pregnant! LOL. John and I are comming to Oklahoma City and will be there March 5th to I believe the 9th. We wanted to stay longer but to do that would have cost us about $300 more. I miss my family and friends dearly and have been bugging him for a while for us to take a trip back. And since things at work have been beyond crazy and stressful for him, we decided a few weeks ago to go ahead and take the trip. I may have done some major arm twisting but after the stresses I have gone through the past few months I need family time.
In my last posting I indicated that I had a new calling in Primary. I am now a Co-Teacher for the CTR 5 Class. Sister Laster and I will trade off weeks that we teach. Im super excited about this change. I have no stress and have found joy in a calling for the first time in a long time. Our ward has a very small Primary but we have some very special kids.
The other fun thing is that I am going to get practice being a mother of a two month old and a three year old for the next two weeks. My friend is having to work this month of January in order for her insurance to cover the recent birth of her daughter. And since Im not working she asked me if I would mind watching the kids when her mother in law went out of town. So we will see if I have it in me LOL. Seriously I have been around her kids and they are both a joy to be around so im excited about it and a little extra spending money won't hurt either.

Changes

As many of you know back at the end of September I was called to be the First Counselor in our Wards Relief Society. At the time I was very overwhelmed but I jumped into it head first and worked very hard. I prayed for guidance and made every attempt to serve to the best of my ability. The last few months have been very challenging for me. My poor mom and husband have had been my rock and sounding board. For that I am truely greatful. Today after many months I was released and put into Primary. There are those I worked with who think they know the reason why, however what they think is not the case. The reasons are not important but I know I did my best.
I would like to share what I learned. I am a much stronger person than I thought and I have learned to stand up for myself even if it means stepping on toes along the way. When I have prayed for answers and guidance and I get the answer DO NOT try to tell me that my answers are wrong. Second, ruling those you are serving with an iron fist, can smother their spirit. This is what happened to me. Those of you who know me well know that me not wanting to go to church is not who I am. Sadly this had become the case. I didnt like the person I was becomming and I was miserable. I hope the President I served with learns the lessons she needs to learn, I hope she is able to grow in the ways she needs. Sadly I cannot be the person to help her.